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Sloppy people reinvent it.
Jones' Second Law: The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on.
Drucker's Point for the Soloist:
"So much of what we call management consists in making it difficult for people to work."
--Peter Drucker
Nesen's Foundation for Collaborative Optimism:
"Nobody believes the official spokesperson, but everybody trusts an unidentified source."
-- Ron Nesen
Universal Policy of Service:
If you want it good and cheap, then it will not be fast.
If you want it fast and good, then it will not be cheap.
If you want it cheap and fast, then it will not be good.
Hugh Macleod's cloud:
Everybody is too busy with their own lives to give a damn about your book, painting, screenplay etc, especially if you haven't sold it yet. And the ones that aren't, you don't want in your life anyway.
The only guard on proficiency is practice.
To know Practice better is to more easily bypass that guard.
Sherlok Merfy's Moranda:
Anything you say or do wrong can and probably wil be used against you
somehow, especially if you are caught.
Sherlok Merfy's Law:
Eliminating the impossible wiL leave you with the truth, unless that
leaves more than one solution, which would make oL uv your considered
answers wrong.
Sherlok Merfy's Death Sentence:
Dying is the only way to stop making mistakes.
SherLok Merfy's Law Enforcement:
Anything you do to prohibit, curtail or limit Murphic Law
will bring more inevitable laws into force.
EkSPAMshun:
A cancerous or un-sustainable growth in ignorant electronic
transmissions --see "September That Never Ended",
"Microsoft Update", or
"Security Threat Alert". Also known as a back-to-reality movement
involving large deposits of hardware that is less than three years old.
Equilibrium:
Stock prices rise during a bull market.
Commodity prices rise during a bear market.
Both animals grow during inflation.
Trade Secrets Legislation in Texas:
Three people can keep a secret if two of them are dead.
Grossman's misquote:
Complex problems have simple, easy to understand, wrong answers.
Murphy's Twelfth Miltary Law, tersened:
Suppresive fire only works on abandoned sites.
Law of risk assessment:
All communication involves risk, so the faster computers go, the more fake and intangible the world becomes.
Law of celebrity press:
No news is good news. If the news were filled with love, peace, joy and happiness, then would commercials appeal so much.
Are gag rags a good source of habits?
What goes around comes around;
Carbon Capture: Making Earth suit dinosaurs by burning their remains even faster.
Erection Period: A time when a woman may decide how and if she will be screwed.
Election Period: A time when many people decide how screwed they will be.